Saturday, June 5, 2010

7th year itch

There's 1 more thing that bugged me about our 7th year relationship: 7th year itch: this time, it comes from external factor. people kept asking when we're getting married.
Oh come on! We're too young for that.. Although we've been through many phases, but still, we, I mean ME, is NOT ready for Marriage. Just yet.

Wow MARRIAGE. 1 powerful word.
What's crossing in your mind when u heard this magic word?
Me personally, when thinking about marriage, that means I have to deal with many things like:
  • - kitchenette (cook, wash the dishes, etc),
  • - motherhood (get pregnant, deliver the baby, breast feeding, get fat, change diapers, n RAISE the baby - that is the MOST important thing, if u're not ready YET, don't even dare to born a new baby to this world)
  • - houses (clean the house, arrange the garden & flowers)
  • - get up in the morning & prepare breakfast to your hubby while u have to go to work too (if there's any).
  • - money -> here's the most sensitive part on the household & marriage. A great woman has to be a money wise. How could I be 1 of those woman when my biggest investment in shoes?
  • - etc. _________________ (Mind to fill in the blank?)

Please don't get me wrong, I don't mean to be cynical. Marriage is way to share happiness too, but hello.. That is the real life I'm talking about, actually some of those came from my friends who already married. And for set the record straight, we're not a couple who only sit down waiting for a falling star n then *abracadabra* House, Wedding Party, Cars, Job all provided by "the parents". We have to earn it.

We'll get a chance to be a King & Queen just once in a lifetime: the day when we throw a wedding party.
But after that.. *drum roll* welcome to the jungle!

I used to be naïve n dreaming about my marriage & born two beautiful children living a nearly perfect life, but fairy tales mostly happen in the storybook children, darling. I don't wanna set up my expectation too high, cos it really hurt when I fall down.
I used to be this girl who really want to get proposed by his longtime boyfriend n couldn't wait to have a baby. But once, when I realized n found out about the fugly truth, it's like a hard slap in my face, it's a wake up call, that I'm not living in a fairy tale where roses are red & violets are blue. But I'm living in real life where there are many problems to deal with.

Back to 7th year itch, well.. There's a saying "go with the flow" geez it's sooooo yesterday. We can't just go with the flow. We must have plans. Plans for the future. So we know our goals n how to achieve it. If we get marry someday, we want to be an independent couple. Whether it's the party, the holy matrimony, the this, the that, they're on our own. So we guess we need more time n work harder. But we know, it's all worth it someday..

Anyhow, beside the nightmare, there r things about marriage that live up my spirit too:
  1. the dress, it doesn't have to be Vera Wang PARFAIT dress, but the dress must reflects who I am. It has to be soooo me.
  2. The shoes, I don't wanna use a dull wedges shoes, (those old pair of shoes that don't hurt your leg?). Big N to the O! Puh-leasee.. I wanna be a real lady who walks in her Manolo, or Louboutin (that's just one dream)
  3. The party, we both don't like Chinese so bye bye Chinese food & tradition blablablah.. That's why we want to be financially freedom :) I'll write my own vow, I'll have my first dance w/ my Dad, n then my hubby through my fave songs that I already picked! Lol. The songs that will be playing must be pick by me. I'm tired with Endless Love. It's time to pick something different.
  4. The honeymoon.. My dream honeymoon would always be exotic beach. I wish I can go to Maldives, I lied. I wish I can go to St. Barts. Geez.

But after all, the most important is not how BIG is your wedding party, how expensive is your dress n make up, how far u go on pre-wedding & honeymoon, MARRIAGE IS NOT ONLY THOSE THINGS. I'm aware of that.
And we must celebrate it, in a decent way.

Nah, the life after marriage is another thing. How u deal with ur new life, how u keep up the balance between ur marriage life-work- children and yourself. U have to be a big hearted girl especially if u want to be a mom. We're still living in fantasy now. We're living in a SAFE ZONE.
Attention must be paid from now on :) So someday, we'll ready to face the "jungle".

Btw if there's someone ask me again, "how long have u been with him?" I said, "oh 7 years". "So when is the big day?" I simply replied, "do u have any other interesting question that that?"


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